The Queerty Frightful Issue
Our friends over at Queerty asked us to make a list of frightful fashions for fall as party of their frightful issue! Check out the list we made especially for them by clicking the link above.
Here are 20 more that we inlisted the help of our fellow GOOL-ies on:
11.True Religion Jeans-- Those big pockets on the butt might hold all your halloween treats; howevah, you won't get no TRICKS if you homoz continue to wear ‘em.
12.While we are on the topic of jeans, enuf with the bootcut, if you haven’t caught on to the skinny leg jean, you must still be wearing True Religion.
13.Square toe dress shoes. Add a chunky heel and we are ready to blow chunks!
14.Slogan t-shirts-No one cares that you’re “sexy” and we can see you are “a boy” unless you are Shania Rendezvous.
15.Rings – If you ain’t married or betrothed, keep the fingers bare.
16.And it’s not about a tongue ring, you fools!
17.No nose-rings unless you’re from India and at least one of your dead relatives has been set afloat on the Ganges.
18.Leather pants – There are like 10 people that can pull them off. Chances are you’re not one of them.
19.No Tongue Rings—Cuz no matter what chu think, it’s just weird to kiss someone with that shizz in their mouth.
20.Diesel footwear- Anyone who wears these shoes should be forced to pour diesel fuel up their bung hole and then eat their own diesel infused bowels!
21.Oakleys: They’re for surfing the urban jungle. Bitch please!!
22.Cell phones clipped to your belt: Chances are your ass is big enough, you don’t need anything else adding to the problem.
23.No one-strap cross-chest backpacks. G-d No! If you want to accentuate your chest, hit the gym chica!
24.Mandals: We know you’re planning your winter getaway but please leave them at home, and while your away, perhaps you’ll have a small electrical fire destroying ONLY your thick leather-strapped numbers cuz there’s nothing like fixing a fashion disaster with a natural disaster.
25. ANYTHING that is trendy or " of the moment:" just coz it's a “must-have item” featured in a magazine does not mean it belongs in your closet! KNOW YOUR STYLE BEOTCH!
26. Coats, suits and/or jackets that are baggy and fit poorly. Get a tailor and cinch that waist and shoulders. And if you don’t have waist then u just need to not exist
anymore.
27. Fake tans: It is one thing to get a nice glow while on vacation in the Carribean with your lovah, but it is another to have a season pass at your local Tan-Faster.
28. Baseball hats on guys who are losing their hair. It’s just dishonest.
29. Camper shoes: We know Thanksgiving is coming up but that don’t mean you gotta wear shoes like the first pilgrim to hit Plymouth Rock. So be thankful we gave you this warning laydie.
30. Athletes feet- not a cute look as Goolies have seen better actin’ in tough actin Tinactin!
Here are 20 more that we inlisted the help of our fellow GOOL-ies on:
11.True Religion Jeans-- Those big pockets on the butt might hold all your halloween treats; howevah, you won't get no TRICKS if you homoz continue to wear ‘em.
12.While we are on the topic of jeans, enuf with the bootcut, if you haven’t caught on to the skinny leg jean, you must still be wearing True Religion.
13.Square toe dress shoes. Add a chunky heel and we are ready to blow chunks!
14.Slogan t-shirts-No one cares that you’re “sexy” and we can see you are “a boy” unless you are Shania Rendezvous.
15.Rings – If you ain’t married or betrothed, keep the fingers bare.
16.And it’s not about a tongue ring, you fools!
17.No nose-rings unless you’re from India and at least one of your dead relatives has been set afloat on the Ganges.
18.Leather pants – There are like 10 people that can pull them off. Chances are you’re not one of them.
19.No Tongue Rings—Cuz no matter what chu think, it’s just weird to kiss someone with that shizz in their mouth.
20.Diesel footwear- Anyone who wears these shoes should be forced to pour diesel fuel up their bung hole and then eat their own diesel infused bowels!
21.Oakleys: They’re for surfing the urban jungle. Bitch please!!
22.Cell phones clipped to your belt: Chances are your ass is big enough, you don’t need anything else adding to the problem.
23.No one-strap cross-chest backpacks. G-d No! If you want to accentuate your chest, hit the gym chica!
24.Mandals: We know you’re planning your winter getaway but please leave them at home, and while your away, perhaps you’ll have a small electrical fire destroying ONLY your thick leather-strapped numbers cuz there’s nothing like fixing a fashion disaster with a natural disaster.
25. ANYTHING that is trendy or " of the moment:" just coz it's a “must-have item” featured in a magazine does not mean it belongs in your closet! KNOW YOUR STYLE BEOTCH!
26. Coats, suits and/or jackets that are baggy and fit poorly. Get a tailor and cinch that waist and shoulders. And if you don’t have waist then u just need to not exist
anymore.
27. Fake tans: It is one thing to get a nice glow while on vacation in the Carribean with your lovah, but it is another to have a season pass at your local Tan-Faster.
28. Baseball hats on guys who are losing their hair. It’s just dishonest.
29. Camper shoes: We know Thanksgiving is coming up but that don’t mean you gotta wear shoes like the first pilgrim to hit Plymouth Rock. So be thankful we gave you this warning laydie.
30. Athletes feet- not a cute look as Goolies have seen better actin’ in tough actin Tinactin!
THANKS QUEERTY!
THAT'S ALL!
Mwa Mwa
THAT'S ALL!
Mwa Mwa
posted by S at 5:32 PM
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